VIGILANTE JUSTICE...FOURTH GRADE STYLE!!!

Elementary students in Japan are sick and tired of being killed...and they're not going to take it anymore! Although crime rates have been falling since 2002, the number of crimes committed against elementary and junior high school students has shot up by 25%.

So what are these targeted tweens going to do about it? Just sit there and let random strangers slit their throats, lock them in closets and kidnap them? Hell, no! These tykes, troubled by a recent spate of little girls who were murdered, have taken matters into their own tiny hands and are forming vigilante groups. Let's roll!

A fifth grader named Iori, interviewed by Weekly Playboy magazine, says, ""Boys in our class said they're going to go on patrols of the streets near our school. They're really strong, so the pedophiles better watch out!"

Before you give up on the younger generation and troubling tendency towards vigilante justice, realize that there's a brighter side: these kids also turn to crime. An unidentified news editor interviewed in the same story says, "Look at last year, when you had four elementary schoolboys arrested for counterfeiting cash on a color copier, then another 9 fourth graders in Aichi taken into custody because they had a gang that specialized in stealing motorbikes. Elementary school pupils have recently been in trouble for blackmailing high school children and for hacking."

Blackmailing high school students? My hat is off to these kids. Who knew that FUDOH was predicting the future?