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August 14, 2006

CHINA: THEY LIVE IN THE FUTURE

Kellychentoilet China. So large. So many different patterns. And...They Live In the Future! You think banning liquids on airplanes is a new security regulation? China has been doing it for years, because they like plane passengers to be slightly dehydrated when they fly because that makes them lighter and less expensive to transport.

But that doesn't mean that China doesn't like all liquids. Chinese celebrities like to brag in public about washing their privates with water. Like Kelly Chen who is spokesmodel for a new kind of ToTo toilet which is part toilet, part bidet. As the giant billboard says: "Have you started washing already? She's started washing..."

Soon, children in China will have more time to wash just like Kelly Chen because China has banned foreign cartoons from primetime. Between 5pm and 8pm kids can only watch Chinese cartoons on TV, which kind of stinks since foreign cartoons are popular and domestic cartoons can't seem to get an audience. Oh well, that'll all change now since the kiddies don't have a choice in what to watch -- which might make them angry. And if they get really angry they can head on over to...

...the Rising Sun Anger Release Bar. Located in Nanjing, this bar encourages customers to scream, break glasses, verbally abuse the staff, and beat designated employees. Sometimes the employees will even dress up like someone you really hate - like the folks at SARFT who won't let you watch foreign cartoons during primetime. But if you're still angry you can be counseled by psychology students. Who can also be beaten for a fee. Why does this bar exist? Because the owner, Mr. Wu Gong, learned about the anger in China firsthand when he was an immigrant worker. He says most of his customers are women. Why is this? Because...

China Lives in the Future.

(Thanks to Danwei, Matt and Steve for this broadcast from tomorrow)

August 14, 2006 at 11:53 AM in News | Permalink

Comments

I very much LOL'd at this entry

Posted by: quadshock | Aug 14, 2006 2:47:29 PM

My favurite post of the day. Thank you!

Posted by: Peter Martin | Aug 14, 2006 3:09:09 PM

I think the owner got the original idea from a Japanese Bar in Japan called the Rising Sun. Why are there so many angry, violent women?

Posted by: razz | Aug 15, 2006 1:40:26 AM

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